Mystery of Christ

After attending a Southern Baptist Church for the first 6 years of my faith, I now am attending a reformed Presbyterian church (Presbyterian Church in America) of which I'm about to become a member with my husband. Going through membership classes and learning about the church, I am faced with a spiritual dilemma regarding baptism, which has made the wheels turn in my mind over covenant theology and dispensationalism.

Though I tend to side with covenant theology most of the time (and with what our new church believes), I'm not convinced at this point that infants should be baptized. But I have, through the study of God's word regarding the promises and election of Israel and the church, stood in awe of the mystery of Christ:

"that the Gentiles are fellow heirs, members of the same body, and partakers of the promise in Christ Jesus through the gospel."

As I've read and re-read Romans 9, 10, & 11, I have rejoiced with Paul and understood (at least in some small way) Paul's bursting out in praise in 11:33 & 36,

"Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable are his judgements and how inscrutable his ways!"

and,

"For from him and through him and to him are all things. To Him be the glory forever. Amen."

What a privelege I have in this "mystery of Christ which was not made known to the sons of men in other generations as it has now been revealed to his holy prophets and apostles by the Spirit" (Eph 3:4-5).

It is such a blessing that the Lord has purposed "before the foundations of the world" for me to live on this side of the cross, having once been "seperated from Christ, alienated from the commonwealth of Israel and [a] stranger to the covenants of promise, having no hope and without God in the world," to being adopted into the family of God by His Sovereign grace and good pleasure.

I have a long way to go before I fully understand covenant theology or dispensationalism or for that matter take some stance on infant baptism. But, until then, I will continue to do as Paul says in Romans 9:20 to "stand in awe" as a Gentile believer who has received grace in spite of my depravity.

PS: Feel free to recommend any books or other material that may help in regard to Infant or Believers' Baptism!